Wednesday, November 10, 2004


Tim LaHaye: Talk Show "Jesus" an Impostor

Los Angeles (MBDBC) -- Fundamentalist activist and novelist Tim LaHaye, 72, thundered out of the pulpit this past Sunday condemning the imposture of someone calling himself "Jesus Christ" on liberal talk shows recently.

"The idea that this liberal demagogue could be Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is simply ludicrous," LaHaye cried. "Jesus wasn't a liberal! Jesus was a compassionate conservative! It's right there in the Bible, people! All you have to do is look!"

He went on to mention Bible passages in which Jesus attacked homosexuality, extramarital sex, masturbation, full nudity (even in your own shower), contraception, and marital sex in anything other than the missionary position or more than once a month.

"Jesus was behind the reelection of our great President, George W. Bush," LaHaye continued. "Millions of born-again Christians prayed to Him, and He answered their prayers."

He added, "The landslide victory Jesus gave President Bush is all the evidence we need--even if it wasn't clearly stated in the Bible, people!--that He is in favor of perpetual holy war against God's enemies, the removal of all restrictions on gun ownership, and the creation of a single-party Christian theocracy in America with George W. Bush as theocrat for life."

LaHaye further confessed that Jesus Himself had appeared to him and his wife Beverly in their Southern California home late Saturday night and confirmed precisely these doctrines.

"And I have to tell you, brothers and sisters," LaHaye concluded, "that He didn't look happy. He was, in fact, quite red with anger--righteous anger at the imposture of some liberal traitor pretending to be Himself."

LaHaye, cofounder with Jerry Falwell in 1979 of the Moral Majority, is better known today as the "theologian" behind the bestselling Left Behind series. LaHaye works out the plot of each novel and gives it to his coauthor Jerry Jenkins to write. The runaway popularity of the series among fundamentalist Christians--those who don't want to be "left behind"--has netted each of them upwards of $10 million.

LaHaye and his wife are both 1950 graduates of fundamentalist Bob Jones University.

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