Thursday, September 02, 2004


What is Sufism? The Debate Rages On

Dr. Alan Godlas, University of Georgia, says that “Sufism or tasawwuf, as it is called in Arabic, is generally understood by scholars and Sufis to be the inner, mystical, or psycho-spiritual dimension of Islam. Today, however, many Muslims and non-Muslims believe that Sufism is outside the sphere of Islam. Nevertheless, Seyyed Hossein Nasr... contends that Sufism is simply the name for the inner or esoteric dimension of Islam. After nearly 30 years of the study of Sufism, I would say that in spite of its many variations and voluminous expressions, the essence of Sufi practice is quite simple. It is that the Sufi surrenders to God, in love, over and over; which involves embracing with love at each moment the content of one's consciousness (one's perceptions, thoughts, and feelings, as well as one's sense of self) as gifts of God or, more precisely, as manifestations of God.”

We here at Sufi U would like to respectfully disagree. Eons of research and lying about on sofas have led us to conclude that Sufism is a farce and a function. It does not exist. It’s just a word bandied about in books and film and on the net. It has no function or form, no substance or purpose, and no scholarly or spiritual merit. It is both Muslim and non-Muslim. It is Christian and both pre- and post-millennial. It both loves and hates Jesus and asks "What Would Emma Goldman Do?" while humming show tunes.

This is why, after more than twenty centuries of serving no students, Sufi U remains open to all students. This is why, after more than 3,000 years, our cafeteria chef (himself a pharaoh) serves no food to anyone who would like to eat it, regardless of race, creed or uvula size.

We are not looking for a quarrel with either Dr. Godlas or Mullah Nasr, but we continue to insist that the essence of Sufism is non-essential and that by insisting on this we are letting go of all essence and therefore, being non-insistent, assuming no use of psychotropics and freedom from all addiction and denial of addiction.

The best evidence of this is the nutritional value of Mullah Billdoug website, compared to other websites of the same height and weight. A recent nutritional analysis conducted by Arbusto Associates confirms this:

WEBSITE Protein (g) Squishy (g) Carbs (g) Moses (g) Wittgenstein (g)
Red Aunt 13.9 3.5 2.9 47.8 5.7
Pupil Pupae 9.6 5.6 2.3 41.7 1.8
Ding Dong 17.2 4.3 .2 30.9 7.7
Mullah Billdoug 134.9 9987.5 574.1 7895.8 9987.5
Large Boobs 14.3 3.3 2.2 27.5 3.0
Maranatha! 13.4 1.4 2.9 22.6 6.0
Fish (Skipjack) 28.5 6.66 6.66 8.7 1.0

Note that Mullah Billdoug has more of the good stuff than ANY other website of its size, and its squishyness is proportional to its Wittgensteinyness, and is even better for you than tuna (skipjack). Coincidence, or the hand of God? We report, you decide.

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