Thursday, September 02, 2004


Hurricanes Converge on Turks and Caicos

Breaking news from the Sufi Caribbean Times:

Turks and Caicos Islands--It's unusual, even for this time of the year, to have so much storm activity in the Caribbean.

Max Mayfield, director of the National Hurricane Center, told reporters yesterday that it is unheard-of to have not one but two hurricanes converging on our part of the Caribbean: the cores or "eyes" of Hurricane Francis and Hurricane Ludwig should both pass over Turks and Caicos Islands within a day or two of each other.

At the very same time, Tropical Storms Gaston, Hudibras, Imogene, Jasper, and Krissy are pounding the peripheries of the Gulf of Mexico.

"It's a great time to be director of the National Hurricane Center," Mayfield said.

For Caribbean Sufis, of course, the convergence of Hurricane Francis and Hurricane Ludwig has a special significance. Francis Skinner, the Limper, the Osteomyelitic, and Ludwig Wittgenstein the Mystical Philosopher King were the homosexual lovers at the very core or eye of twentieth-century Sufi power.

Skinner died in 1941, Wittgenstein in 1951. But death does not still the power of a Sufi adept.

Some Sufis on the islands, in fact, confident that the two hurricans converging on their homes in the next few days are in fact reincarnations of the great lovers, Limper and King, are refusing to evacuate. They are convinced that the hurricanes will bring not just great destructive force but great mystical power, and do not want to miss either.

"You can't have healing power without destruction," Mullah Billdoug, renowned Sufi time-traveler, said yesterday evening from the front steps of the Paris Hilton in Cockburn Town, Grand Turk. The hotel was hastily being boarded up, as storm winds stiffened. The Mullah Billdoug arrived late yesterday afternoon from the distant future, where he was hunting down the dastardly killer of his friend Bill Kaul.

He said his journey into the future brought many spiritual rewards but no word on Kaul's killer. He happened to read about the convergence of Hurricane Francis and Hurricane Ludwig on a scrap of newsprint in a Sufi museum several billion years in the future, and decided to return for it.

"Hurricanes are great sources of power," he said. "The destruction they wreak pulls down the old and makes room for the new. Spiritual insight becomes possible."

He said he was hoping the hurricanes would "show him the circular path to Bill Kaul's killer."

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